Monday 2 January 2012

A Greek Tragedy in Five Acts

The Financial Times has come up with an absolutely hilarious opener to 2012. Happy New Year to all!

ATHENS. The spotlight opens on George Papandreou, who is at home in bed, tossing in his sleep.

Papandreou (waking up): Great gods! Will these nights never end? Will daylight never come? I heard the cock crow hours ago, but my indolent and totally corrupt people are still snoring away! Curses on this debt crisis! Curses on Pasok! I can’t even sack my own public servants.

The spotlight switches to the top floor of Papandreou’s home and reveals the Troika of Creditors, who are armed with iPads and studying a pile of dusty Greek ledgers.

First Creditor: It really is quite remarkable. Until last month more than 1,000 dead pensioners were receiving payments from Greece’s biggest pension fund.

Second Creditor: And what about this? The Greek state considers 637 types of job to be so arduous that the people doing them get early retirement.

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